TSD rally song!

Remember days when rallies
were simple and serene
You had a chance to cruise along
and dig the local scene

But an HMS and a stopwatch
would make it for the worst
And when your wife could navigate the course
and still have time to smoke

Those days are gone forever
it’s a nightmare not a dream
Instructions for the rally teams
would make an Einstein scream

For the pros are running rallies
and to make it all worthwhile
They calculate the distances
in the millionths of a mile

You think that you have got it made
when you’re three seconds late
You find that you are 30th
in a field of 28

There’s a Terratrip on your dashboard
a Garmin in the door
PB on the clipboard
and a Tripy on the floor

Your wife no longer rides with you
you kept her out by force
It doesn’t build togetherness
but it helps prevent divorce

Now your present navigator
is a real live Ph.D.
He teaches Calculus and stuff
at a school called IIT

But even he can’t beat the game
you’re still lost in the pack
You’d better kick him out
and get a TSDMeter!

(bastardization of The Rally Song, Oscar Brand, 1962)

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